Today I brought some cake with me. Not just any cake, chocolate cake, chocolate butter cream frosting, whipped chocolate ganache and on top, chocolate curls.
Recipe here.
The reason I brought this chocolate treat over here today, is because I needed a little "pick-me-up".
My goal for this year has been:
Do one thing everyday that scares you.
-Eleanor Roosevelt
Now, I can't pretend that every day is full of exciting adventure that has a heroic ending. But until yesterday, all these brave/scary things had quite (to my surprise) happy endings!
Last night, was to be my first class of a two week "maintenance summer class" with the Milwaukee b
Ballet School. After quitting ballet for over 5 years and joining again this winter, I have had quite the difficult task of remembering french, remembering the positions, remembering combinations and the ever-so-difficult task of attempting to make my body move like it used to, or at least how it should.
I nervously made the drive downtown, parked my car and paid the meter (all while sweating profusely) I was 30 minutes early, just what I wanted although everyone inside gave me looks that made me rethink my decision. I wandered around the Jodi Peck Center, wishing that if I had to take an advanced class "couldn't it at least be at the Milwaukee Ballet campus I take class at, the one by my house?" In a new building, I stumbled through several different doors until a kind girl pointed me upstairs to the dressing room. I quickly changed and the second I stepped foot into the studio, where other dancers were already warming up, I knew. This class was definitely above my level. I knew right then, I would be making many mistakes. At that very moment, my confidence left me. Confidence in ballet class is crucial, I promise you will make a mistake if you do not have it.
From an outsider's perspective watching the class, they would probably tell you that the combinations were lovely. The dancers were lovely. The jumps, turns, barre and pointe work, absolutely stunning. They would also probably tell you that there seemed to be one girl in class that was just not yet ready to be taking this class - I'll let you guess who that was.
I left pretty embarrassed, in fact the entire class I was trying to figure out a way to slip out without being rude to the teacher. But, this was my scary thing for the day. It took courage and loads of prayers. On the car ride home, I repeated to myself "My worth is not in my performance or talents". I am so happy this is true. As for next week, I will be joining in a slightly lower level. I'm certainly not giving up!
See why I needed some chocolate today?
I hope you have some too, while trying something that requires courage.
And you can always let me know how it goes!
Love,
Elise
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